Birthday Note for 2026

Another year, another milestone

My wife and kid, back in January 2026 before we moved back to Indonesia

Today is my birthday and usually I do a birthday write-up. Sometimes I post it, sometimes I don’t. This year, I want to make it a habit to do it every year, and post it online. It will remind me how I grow over the years, and of the challenges I faced and will continue to face in that particular year.

In 2025, I lost my job due to a lay-off, followed by a brief period at another company. It was a learning experience as I figured out what kind of environment I would want to be in. The second job in 2025 was not a good fit for me. I think I thrive better in a more mature and structured organisation, at least for full-time work.

Being a people manager for the last three years has taught me many things: design is no longer just the “craft” you deal with in Figma. It is also about “crafting” organisations and human relationships. Sometimes politics becomes part of it too, and it can be painful and revealing. Such is working life.

I took a bold step in January 2026 to move my family back to Indonesia after nearly 10 years in Singapore. We became permanent residents there, and my daughter had been living and studying there up to Primary 5. But after leaving my job again in November 2025, we decided it was “enough” for the time being. Things had become more fragile, emotionally and financially, so we decided to retreat for a while. At the same time, my father-in-law’s health had been worsening and my wife was understandably worried. So be it, let’s move back. After spending more than S$10,000 on moving costs (never again) and losing our rental deposit, we finally arrived home on 31 January 2026.

It felt surreal. Two years ago, I could never have imagined myself making such a decisive move. My wife also felt it was the right thing to do. Let’s regain our sanity and our lives, and rebuild things brick by brick.

The last year humbled me greatly. I used to think stability was something you eventually unlocked permanently after years of hard work, experience, and sacrifice. It turns out adulthood keeps renegotiating you. Careers can shift quickly. Plans can collapse quietly. Sometimes you outgrow environments, and sometimes environments outgrow you.

At 40, I have also started realising how much stress accumulates silently in the body. Recovery feels different. You think differently. Things that once felt exciting can suddenly just feel noisy. Peace of mind is becoming less of a luxury and more of a necessity.

I also realise success looks very different now compared to 10 years ago. Back then, success meant movement: new countries, bigger companies, bigger opportunities, constantly proving myself. These days, I think more about sustainability. About whether a life can actually be lived calmly, honestly, and meaningfully over the long term.

Moving back to Indonesia has been emotionally strange too. Singapore shaped a huge part of my adulthood, worldview, habits, and identity. Leaving it behind feels painful and relieving at the same time. Coming home also means rediscovering parts of myself that had been buried beneath ambition, survival, and routine.

There is also something uncomfortable about restarting at 40. You compare yourself with peers. You question your decisions. You wonder whether you are moving backwards. But perhaps life is less linear than we imagine. Perhaps rebuilding is not always failure. Perhaps retreating temporarily is also a form of wisdom.

I do not fully know yet what 41 will bring. Financially, professionally, mentally — things still feel uncertain in many ways. But perhaps this chapter is no longer about acceleration. Perhaps it is about rebuilding life in a way that is healthier, calmer, and more sustainable.

For now, that is enough.